Harley:

It’s been a while since we’ve had this kinda fun, Red. Your new boy toys are really workin’ out swell!

Ivy:

I concur, Harl. They’re so faithful, so loyal and obedient.

The plant-man driver is staring forward, zombie like. Ivy leans in close to his ear and whispers seductively.

You’re much happier this way, aren’t you? Hanging on my every whim. Loving every service you perform for me until the toxins that caused your mutation do you in?

The plant-man nods hypnotically as he drives.

Harley:

You’re good, Ivy. But I’ve got something even better up my sleeve.

Ivy:

You’ve been going on about this for days! Out with it already, I want to know what you’re planning so I can preemptively squelch your stupidity!

Harley:

Yeesh, have a little faith. First we’ve gotta tuck the boys in for bed, then it’s party time for us. Where we’re goin‘, they can’t follow.

Their getaway car enters an underground parking garage. Marvel Girl hovers up along the side of the skyscraper the garage is connected to. She waits just outside the balcony as Ivy, Harley, and their henchmen get off the elevator into Ivy’s suite. There’s a small garden on the balcony and empty stasis tubes lining the walls. The plant men are unloading the cash, and sorting it near a large safe. Ivy and Harley stroll out onto the balcony. Harley is messing with her pop-gun.

Hey, Red. You think I could use some of that money to buy a new spring-loaded-punching-glove-gun-thing-of-a-bob?

Ivy:

When has that thing ever come in handy?

Harley:

There was that time I knocked Catwoman into that vat of glue.

Ivy:

And then what happened?

Harley:

…it recoiled and I was dragged in with her…

Ivy:

Ha! I thought so.

Harley:

Aw, laugh it up! But wait’ll the nights up. You’ll be on your hands and knees thankin’ me!

Marvel Girl:

Trapping them in a force field:

Doubtful. Here’s a tip, ladies. When robbing a bank in the city where the Justice League operates, try and be a little more inconspicuous.

Ivy:

Oh, you’re that Fantastic Four girl, aren’t you? Well we’d love to stick around and play, but I’ll bet your cronies aren’t far behind.

Harley:

BOYS!

The Plant-Men assemble on the balcony and rush Marvel Girl. She wraps herself in a Force Field as they ram her sending her flying into the building across the way. She anchors herself with another force field and fires several cosmic blasts. The Plant-men nimbly avoid each blast and stretch their limbs out at her. They grab her and vines from Ivy’s garden start to strangle her. A red, white, and blue streak smashes through them severing the vines and the creature’s arms. Supergirl stands opposite Harley and Ivy. Batgirl dives down onto Harley’s back and bat cuffs her. She turns towards Ivy.

Ivy:

Well isn’t this grand. Batman and Superman’s pathetic female spin-offs.

You kids play nice.

Harley:

Oh this is dignified!

Marvel Girl:

What?! That should have just stunned them.

Batgirl:

These things were human once. Ivy infected them with a new strand of her plant mutagen. Their condition was fatal. The exhilaration of our fight must have sped things up.

Marvel Girl:

Oh my god…

Supergirl:

It’s okay, I don’t think we could have helped them. They were pretty far along.

Marvel Girl:

So the famous Batgirl and Supergirl. Thanks for the assist, it’s a pleasure.

Batgirl:

Wish I could say the same.

Marvel Girl:

Shocked/Confused:

Uh… come again?

Batgirl:

I’ve been tracking Harley and Ivy for a week now! Supergirl and I were waiting patiently for Ivy’s Plant-Men to go into their nightly hibernation. After that, we could have taken them defenseless. You showed up and brought the wrath of all their super-strength on us. What exactly did you think you were doing, “Marvel Girl”?

Marvel Girl:

I didn’t--

Supergirl:

Save it. You screwed up. We’re going to have to find them from scratch now.

Marvel Girl:

Not exactly. I’m a telepath.

Batgirl:

And I’m supposed to trust the psychic who couldn’t predict that angering a greenhouse full of plant-mutants was a bad idea?

Marvel Girl:

It doesn’t exactly work that way. Look, before they took off I picked up something in Harley’s head about the Governor’s mansion. It could be their next move.

Supergirl:

We’ll look into it.

Marvel Girl:

I’ll help.

Batgirl:

We’ve had enough help from you, thanks. Maybe you should go back to the Watchtower and file data-disks.

The hatch begins to slide shut.

Marvel Girl:

Under her breath:

What a bi--

Batgirl:

What’s that?

Marvel Girl:

I was going to say “bat”.

Batgirl:

Sure.

Scene: Harley and Ivy are driving along a dark forest road outside of Metropolis.

Ivy:

Well this night was a total waste! Not only did we lose the entire heist, but I have to harvest a whole new batch of slaves!

Harley:

Hey, cheer up, Ivy!

Ivy:

Why should I?!… um… Harl?… Where are you taking us?

Harley:

It’s my surprise!

She turns off and up a winding road to the Governor’s mansion.

Ivy:

Who’s house is this?

Harley:

It WAS the Governor’s. For the time being its ours…

And all our friends‘!

Just about every Marvel and DC Super-Villainess is gathered around the room. There’s food and drinks and music and socializing. A giant banner reads “Happy Birthday Poison Ivy.”

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RED!!!

The other guests seem rather apathetic. A few of them wave or nod in their direction.

Ivy:

Uh… Harley… it isn’t my birthday.

Harley:

Harley drags Ivy around the room towards the refreshments. They pass notable fem-fatales along the way including but not limited to: Star Sapphire, White Queen, Cheetah, Killer Frost, Spiral, Giganta, Aresia, Scorpia, the female Doctor Octopus, Shikata, Livewire, Volcana, Vertigo, Dorma, Scream, Lancer, Titania etc.

Yeesh! Details! Like you’d ever tell me. Look, Red, you’ve been sooooo good to me over the years. I just wanted to do something nice for you in return for a change. Let’s relax and have a good time.

Ivy:

Harley… this is very sweet… but… well… I don’t even know half the people here.

Harley:

Well I told a few of our friends and confidants and they told a few more and so on and so on. Sure it got a little out of hand, but everyone’s here for the same reason. There’s booze, and snacks and party favors, and best of all no tight-wearing-do-gooders for miles around!

Ivy:

I’m shocked to say it but… this was a really good idea.

Harley pours them each a glass of champaign.

Harley:

Now here’s the best part! You remember Aresia don’t you?

Ivy:

Uh… sure?

Harley:

She’s coated the grounds in her special virus. Not a single male can get anywhere near the place without dropping dead like the late-Governor and his acquaintances!

Ivy:

What happens when people come looking for the Governor?

The phone rings. Mystique answers it as she morphs into the Governor.

Mystique:

I told you, not tonight! I have prior obligations… we’ll discuss it in the morning.

Laughing:

Now this, is brilliant.

Batgirl:

There’s definitely something toxic in the air. Ivy’s got to be here. Do you see anything inside?

Supergirl:

Just a second.

Good lord! It’s every bad girl in the book and then some! We’re going to need some major backup.

Livewire:

Well looky who’s here! It’s the gosh darn girl scouts! Well we don’t want any cookies!

Batgirl:

What did you just do?

Marvel Girl:

I sent her via-satellite. No idea where she’ll end up. Hopefully far away.

They hear the front door open, and the female Doc Ock approaches them.

Dr. Octopus:

Hey, Livewire! What’s going on out here?

From Dr. Octopus’s perspective we see a psychic illusion of Livewire by herself.

Marvel Girl:

As Livewire:

Can’t a girl get a little fresh air around her, tin limbs?!

Dr. Octopus:

Suit yourself.

Supergirl:

Nice trick.

Marvel Girl:

Still think I should be filing disks?

Batgirl:

We’ll see. Let’s get out of sight. That’s not going to work on all of them.

They ascend to the roof and observe through a skylight window. Marvel Girl masks them.

Harley:

Uh… who spiked the punch?

Looking directly at Killer Frost:

With tiny razor sharp ice spikes???

Killer Frost grins and shrugs.

Cuts back to the roof.

Her eyes glowing as she probes the minds of the villains:

There’s no sense bringing the Justice League in for this… the Amazon over there is responsible for the allergen you detected, Batgirl. We’ll be okay, but it‘s super concentrated to be instantly lethal to men. I’m working on getting a signal to Rogue, but it’s taking a lot just to shield us from Emma Frost.

Batgirl:

It’s obvious we can’t handle this on our own. We should retreat quietly.

Supergirl:

Uh oh.

Cuts to inside, as she changes views of the outside on a four-way split screen.

Star Sapphire:

Any unwanted guests, Spiral?

Cuts back to the roof:

Supergirl:

We’re done for.

Marvel Girl:

Relax I’m making us invisible even to her cameras.

Cuts back to inside. Spiral’s surveillance cameras land on the parked Bat-Wing.

Spiral:

Batman?

Cuts back to the roof:

Marvel Girl:

Doh!

Batgirl:

They know we’re here! We have to make a run for it!

The three of them turn around to find the White Queen, Cheetah, and Scream already blocking their escape.

White Queen:

Well, well, if it isn’t the marvelous Valeria Richards. I’ve been wanting to settle my score with you since the Air Ship battle.

Harley:

Well, well, well. We’ve got ourselves some party crashers!

Ivy:

The Question is what to do about it. Ladies?

Scream:

Tear them to shreds!

Killer Frost:

I agree, lets kill them now and make it painful and instantaneous!

Lancer:

No!

She walks up to Marvel Girl.

They can be useful to us alive.

Giganta grows several stories tall behind them and grabs Batgirl and Supergirl. Marvel Girl jumps up to try and release them but a beam from Star Sapphire deflects her. Vertigo approaches her and begins to induce nausea upon her. Marvel Girl struggles but eventually passes out.

Delivery Boy:

Um… did you order 26 family size pepperoni pizzas?

Giganta:

Could you please bring them up here for me?

As the delivery boys approaches he grows visibly ill and falls dead. Giganta picks up the stack of Pizza Boxes. Harley steps outside.

Harley:

You can set those down in the kitchen, Stretch.

Giganta:

Oh, I’m sorry. These were just for me.

She goes back inside.

Harley:

Yeesh.

Cuts inside: Marvel Girl wakes up in one of the bed rooms, restrained with power inhibiting gloves. Supergirl is similarly restrained, while Batgirl is bound with normal but efficient restraints. Scorpia is standing guard.

Scorpia:

Feeling better?

Marvel Girl:

What’s it to you?

Scorpia:

You little snots are ruining what was a great night. We weren’t hurting anyone… except all those delivery boys, and the Governor and his family…

The heroes glare at her.

…look the point is we were TRYING to have fun. Now I’m stuck babysitting while the others deliberate how and when to kill you.

Marvel Girl:

You’re sad.

Scorpia:

Putting her stinger up against Marvel Girl’s neck:

And why is that? Because I’m a sick twisted super-criminal in need of moral guidance from some punk teenager?!

Marvel Girl:

No.

Scorpia:

Why then?

Marvel Girl:

It’s sad that I’ve never even heard of you before. I mean Batgirl and Supergirl here may be knock-offs of their iconic masculine counterparts, but you for whatever reason decided you needed to model yourself on a man who was already a notorious loser.

Scorpia:

Why you little--

Batgirl:

Thanks for the distraction.

Marvel Girl:

Don’t mention it. It’s getting harder to use my telepathy. Frost is making some kind of psychic bubble around the place. If I try to send or receive any more signals they’ll know we’ve escaped.

Supergirl:

We’re out of here, and we’re going the old fashioned way.

She punches a hole in the wall to the outside.

Hang on to me.

Suddenly Giganta’s massive fist comes through the hole smashing the three heroes clear through the wall and back into the main room. Marvel Girl protects them with a force field. Again the villains surround them leaving them no exit.

Ivy:

Trying to escape? Tsk Tsk… now I don’t care what anyone says, we’re definitely killing them.

Killer Frost:

Quick and painful?

Ivy:

Quick and painful. Have at them ladies.

Marvel Girl:

Hold it! You’re all super-villains, you like clichés. So you know what, I’m just going to go ahead and say it.

Ivy:

What?

Marvel Girl:

You’re never going to get away with it!

All laugh.

Harley:

And what are you gunna do, short stuff?! Tell your mommy?!

Marvel Girl:

Actually…

…yeah.

The Invisible Woman appears in the doorway.

Invisible Woman:

You lay a finger on my daughter and you answer to me.

Star Sapphire:

What difference does this make, you’re still out-gunned!

Invisible Woman:

Sorry about the delay, Val. But it took me a while to scrounge up some all-female support.

She gradually turns the front wall of the mansion invisible revealing just outside Wonder Woman, Rogue, Hawkgirl, Black Cat, Katma Tui, Jubilee, and Zatanna.

Mystique:

Impressive. But the odds are still on our side.

Behind the other super-heroines Phoenix rises up and explodes into a fiery bird of raw telekinesis.

…crap!

The Super-Heroine’s burst through the front wall of the mansion and an all out brawl ensues. The action is very quick and fluid as the camera moves from one hero to the next transitioning as they watch each other’s back and new characters begin fighting in the foregrounds. IE: Black Cat dives at Shikata and begins hand to hand combat then is attacked by Lancer from behind, Jubilee blasts Lancer saving Black Cat from being sliced then blasts Doc Ock before she can lash out at Batgirl, Katma Tui uses GL bubbles to snag those who attempt to flee, Zatanna fires bolts of magic to disorient/trap villains, Phoenix has snagged multiple individuals in a Telekinetic storm and is slamming them all around the room, Hawkgirl bashes into Scream with her electrified mace before she has a chance to shred Jubilee. Giganta grows massive, splintering through the roof. Wonder Woman snags her legs with her lasso and Rogue and Supergirl topple her, causing mass chaos and destruction in the room. Vertigo begins to disrupt the heroes senses in the room, but Phoenix blasts her from inside her mind and ends the disruptions. Killer Frost flash freezes Phoenix, but she immediately bursts back out and KOs Frost. Aresia begins a heated battle with Rogue and Supergirl; Wonder Woman hurls Titania into her and the two begin to fight each other. Katma Tui continues to round up defeated bad guys, but the battle rages on.

Rogue:

I really don’t think anyone wants this to end up on late night Mojovision with some racy cuts spliced in, sugah.

Ivy:

Try as you might, Marvel Girl, plants don’t have nervous systems. You can’t affect it with your powers.

You could maybe stop me, but my pet here would keep going. Though you look a little weak now. The thorns are slowing you down aren’t they? They release quite a potent venom.

Marvel Girl is growing visibly weaker as she nears the mouth.

It’s too bad your allies are so busy. You may have ruined everything for me twice tonight, but at least I’ll have the satisfaction of knowing you dissolved in the acid of my baby here.

A Batarang sails down the stairs and explodes in the creature’s mouth destroying it. Batgirl swings down the stairs and kicks Ivy in the face rendering her unconscious.

Batgirl:

Watch yourself, Marvel Girl.

Marvel Girl:

Ow!

Batgirl:

Sorry, but you’ll be glad when you can breathe.

Supergirl:

Zips downstairs:

Everything okay?

Batgirl:

It’s fine.

Supergirl:

They’ve got things under control up there. You’re lucky Batgirl was watching your back.

Marvel Girl:

I know… I’m sorry… again.

Batgirl:

Don’t be too hard on yourself. You know, I have to admit, we were pretty confused when you joined the League. We weren’t even extended an offer.

Marvel Girl:

Gee, I’m sorry. To be honest I kind of forced them to let me in. I sort of don’t take no for an answer sometimes.

Supergirl:

We noticed. But it sure came in handy tonight.

Thanks for your help, Marvel girl.

Batgirl:

Places her hand on top of theirs:

We’ll have to do it again. But next time, let us know first.

Wonder Woman:

Is this everyone?

Storm:

Sorry I’m late. The outer perimeter seems clear. I’m going to do one final sweep.

Invisible Woman:

Thanks, Storm. I’m glad you decided to join us.

She smashes “Storm” into the wall with a force field. She falls down and reverts back to Mystique.

Though you were supposed to be halfway across the globe. Now that’s all of them.

Scene: About an hour later. Maggie Sawyer and the female members of the SCU are escorting restrained villains to holding vans.

Zatanna steps up to the Invisible Woman.

Zatanna:

My spell of purification rid the area of disease. Let the men know they can--

Flash zips up.

Flash:

We heard.

Human Torch:

Are there any more scantily clad super chicks to round up?!

Invisible Woman:

Sorry, guys.

Iceman:

Are you sure?

Zatanna:

That was the last of them.

Gestures to the SCU van driving away.

Flash:

Oh… Well… do any of you ladies want to hang out or anything?

The other super-women start to leave.

Iceman:

Anyone?… I can make smoothies.

Flash:

Well this just bites.

Human Torch:

What I would give to have seen that…

Iceman:

Amen…

Harley:

I said I was sorry… C’mon, Red.

Ivy:

Bug off.

Voice:

I’m not so sure about you anymore.

Ivy:

You, again?

Voice:

You’re not as ruthless as your namesake, Ivy. You’re weak with pity.

Ivy gestures to Harley.

Ivy:

I assume you’re talking about her? Well you’re wrong. She’s nothing to me. Good for a laugh every now and then… that’s all.

Voice:

You’re deluding yourself. You’re of no use to me.

Ivy:

No. You’ve got it all wrong. I’ve learned my lesson. I’m going back to my roots. Human beings are repulsive and twisted. They deserve nothing short of pure unforgiving poison.

Voice:

Then enter.